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The Genetic Disease

Come down
on silky wings of soft
warmth Fill
me with silent will Save
me from myself
Hopelessness dawns on the horizon
and despair drowns
me with dark insecurities
Unable to swim
I sink
into a strong abyss
Lithium can't lift me up Brooding
in my belly like bitter lemons
maniac-depressive mood
swings massive suicidal tendencies
all push me Down
a predestined Path of pandemonium

Silence surrounds me
and explodes
I scare myself
so I hide deep
caged by fear of violence

Deception bore in me
a tasteless dogbane
beautifully planted
poison slowly in my brain

I thought I saw myself today
looking out the window
the blink of an eye
slyly hidden by my reflection
a prediction some say
How trivial
to die in these walls
damp with normalcy

Desperation claws at my insides
as I become more like her
or is she more like me
Both claim to be Victoria
so I'm split shared
by two maybe three

The soft finality of life seeps into my soul
time evolves into man's volatile enemy
attacking with precise quickness
life functions as an indestructible machine
programmed to confuse and consume

I'm full of sadness and death
always looms on the horizon
Logic, my only friend, informs me
I can't quit just yet

It seems to be that one can only see
where there is no light
convoluted images of purpose and destiny
seen only in the darkness of night
could it all be one big mistake
who will divide the real from the fake
such simple questions deserve simple answers
the game is complicated and freaks are the players
all tug harder on the leash
desperately seeking a mirage of freedom
In a desolate soul full of rage
relief taste like the blood of a sinful nun
why seek sanity instead of madness
where is the key, is it a test
pain leads to perfect logic
the dead wiser than the living
good and evil suffer the same fate
locked behind an open rusted gate

-Victoria Lowery

Last update: Saturday, August 19, 2000 10:47

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